市日
你这文章问题也多过头了吧.多余的重复用语和语法错误层出不穷,得全面修改了- -111 雷.............. 我帮你改下吧................不过你自己看下修改点吧.........多得我都怀疑自己写了新的,我英语水准还算可以,6级以上的,改动的地方太多了,你原来那个的水准实在低过头了,这是你人生大事,你花钱找人写也好啊= =改动起码30多处,大处理的地方多了去了,雷- -Self –introction My name is(你的名字)。I'm a school student who studies science. I am a diligent student who is in the favor of pursuing truth. In 2008, I won the second award in the National Biology Competition and that I also won the second award in the National Writing Contest. I have been studying in our school since 2003 when I was still a middle school student. Therefore I have a special love with our school. Our school has a long history of 45 years. It is a school which is specialized in foreign language teaching.The school life with a 9 years of compulsory ecation gives me a lot of things to learn, a lot of chances to try, and a lot of practices to take to improve myself, it taught me not only the importance of practical ability, but also how to study and think by myself. When in the school, besides studying, I have also joined the Student Union , in which my ty is to help others organize and design activities . I have wide interests in my spare time. I like playing football, which is an effective way to improve my body health, and it can teach me how to join in a group and deal with other people. Drawing and photography are also my hobbies. I love sketching and traditional Chinese painting. I often helped design our school bulletin, which were well received by teachers and students. I am also very disquisitive and have a lot of hands-on experience. Whenever teachers and students have problems on computers, they would come to me for help. As for my family, both my parents are teachers. I love them as much as I love this world. They have sacrificed so much that I hope in the future they would take pride in me. The reason why I want to be recommended to this school XJTU is that I am deeply impressed by the school-running features of high starting point, thick foundation, strict requirements and stressing practice. I know this university has a long history of more than 100 years. And the people of XJTU invented the first dynamo, the first radio-station, the first diesel and the first Chinese typewriter in China. Today XJTU passed the key construction of national “ Seventh Five-year Plan” “ Eighth Five-Year Plan”, “211 Project “ and “985 Project”. It has developed into a university that has the feature of science and Engineering and covers 9 subjects. Therefore I think the process of studying in this university can enrich my knowledge and make me competent in my future job. I do hope this university can give my ability and specialities full play. Finally, I want to talk about a very practical reason. That is my dream of studying in a different city. I want to experience studying in a different atmosphere, And I want to realize my dream and make myself to a well-qualified person. That’s my simple and clear reason that why I choose this university.开头的三个i am有点傻,几乎所有句子的主语都是I!非常单调而且有的地方从句用得太刻意,不自然,不必要如,And I am a hard-working and diligent student who likes pursuing truths.最后一段的前半部分还行,其它部分可能不是很地道,有些chinglish。但是反正是面试嘛,口头表达的时候比书面看起来应该舒服点,其实面试的人不一定懂英语的。我今年也保研了,面试的时候那个紧张啊,那个英语说得……但是老师只catch到了一个字,正好是他蛮欣赏的字,还说我说得不错。所以放轻松啦I do hope this university can give my ability and specialities full play。 这句话是不是有点chinglish呢?I do hope my ability and specialities can be dispayed in XJTU.不过内容上看起来,理由不怎么充分呢……除了介绍西交的那段,其它完全可以套在其它的外地学校上嘛